🚌 Parody · Entertainment only

Always running late.
Never just running.

The bus app that tells you exactly what you already feared. Absurd arrival times, seats you can chope with a tissue packet, and a "live" map where the bus drives into the sea.

v3.0 · still loading since 2019

Bus 3rd app advert
> Triangulating your disappointment…   ●   Asking the uncle…   ●   Downloading more buses…   ●   Recalculating (badly)…   ●   Bribing the bus captain…   ●   Generating false hope…   ●   Waiting for 88. Still waiting…   ●   Consulting the void…   ●

The Features (the gags)

Five tabs. Zero buses.

Everything works beautifully. Nothing works the way you'd want.

🕐

Arrivals board

Live, chaotic countdowns. Negative minutes, 420m, "soon™", "napping". All three of the 88 arrive together — as a treat.

🗺️

Live Map™

A hand-painted map (no Google Maps, no API key) with a wandering bus. Recalculating… into the sea 🌊. Driver stopped for kaya toast.

🧻

Chope a seat

Tap empty seats to reserve them with a tissue packet, lah. Random aunties steal your seat over time. As tradition demands.

🔖

Saved stops

Save the routes you love most. "Saved 3 years ago. Still hoping." A monument to your optimism.

🔔

Prank notifications

Local-only funny alerts. "Someone choped your seat with a tissue 🧻." "The bus is now a boat. Please bring floaties."

🏳️

Give Up

The only honest button in the app. Confirm you've given up and receive your certificate of inner peace. Walk home (47 min).

Live arrivals (allegedly)

Real-time disappointment

A faithful preview of the board. Timings are fictional and intentionally inaccurate.

Your Stop · 99 nowhere LIVE
88 Toa Payoh Int
All 3 will arrive together. As a treat.
2 min (lies)
L8 Eventually
It is in the name. You knew this.
~ ~ ~
M80 Cancelled (vibes)
Last seen heading to the kopitiam.
—
969 Woodlands Checkpoint
It is full. It is SO full. Bo space.
Arr
NR7 Night Rider
Last bus left without you. Typical.
Gone

★ 1.2 · 9,481 reviews

Loved by no one. Used by everyone.

Real reviews from fictional commuters.

AD
Auntie Doris, 61
★☆☆☆☆

"Wait 40 min for 88, when come got three buses together. Walao. One star still too generous."

UT
Uncle Tan, 67
★★☆☆☆

"Driver see me running, still close door and smile. I know that man. We not friends anymore."

XM
Xiao Ming, 23
★★★★★

"Used this app to plan my commute. Now I plan my funeral. 10/10 very realistic sia."

Me
Auntie Mei, 54
★☆☆☆☆

"App say 2 min. I aged 2 years. Bus 3rd indeed. My grandson grew up already."

🤡

This is a joke.

Bus 3rd is a parody / comedy app for entertainment only. All bus timings, routes, stops, seats and notifications are completely fictional and intentionally inaccurate. Do NOT use this app to catch a real bus.

Bus 3rd is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or connected to any real transit operator or government agency.

Privacy: no accounts, no analytics, no ads, no location tracking. Your settings stay on your device. "Data Not Collected."

no buses were harmed. none showed up either.